Don’t let people put you down…!
“Don’t allow yourself to be upset.” – Jesus
There is a proverb in Sanskrit, “You should be more watchful of friends than enemies.” Most people get swayed by the comments made by others, specially from their close ones. Because you can see enemies as enemies and be watchful of them but you can’t see friends as enemies and can’t keep them at bay. But the irony is that, inadvertently, we all pay heed to such remarks and get influenced by them. We know that it is going to cause severe troubles in our lives still we focus on the criticism, as a matter of fact most people become paranoid, and get harmed.
We interact with hordes of people each day but strangely most of us get discussing that we shouldn’t. It is easy to locate a group of people busy condemning others than appreciating. There had been people who made history, who were immensely ridiculed, like Wald Disney, Thomas Edison, Steve Jobs, Mahatma Gandhi etc. despite that they all succeeded because they focused on their craft than on people labeling them down.
“Albert Einstein’s teacher told Einstein father, no matter what Albert does, he will never be successful – People don’t make our destiny God does.”
Most of the time the reason people say hurtful, critical things is simply because they are jealous of who you are. Most often the reason you have haters is because down deep they want to become just like you. But the key is to keep them close without digging into them, don’t let them enter into your spirit. Invest your energy and emotions in things that are important to you not in trivial issues or worrying about naysayers.
Nindak nihare rakhiye, aangan kuti chhaway
Bin pani bin sabun, nirmal kare subhav
निंदकनियरेराखिये, आँगनकुटीछवाय |
बिनपानीबिनसाबुन, निर्मलकरेसुभाव || — Kabir Das
— MEANING —
“Keep your critic close, you get to know your faults if someone criticizes you, and you have a chance to correct them. Give your critics shelter in your courtyard and listen to the criticism without annoyance, because critic is not your enemy, he is helping you to clean the rubbish from your life without soap and water.”
“No one can make you inferior without your permission,” said Eleanor Roosevelt. Sometimes when you are down, people will try to keep you down, they will remind you all the reasons why in this world you are never going to be what you could have been. However hard anyone tries to play you down just listen to your inner voice and say, ‘You are not what people label you, you are what God labels you.’
We can’t stop negative things from happening to us but keep our walls up. Build yourself up, edify yourself. If you want to live happily then build walls around you and don’t allow worries and remarks disturb you. You can’t stop people from saying things, but you can do one thing that is not to allow that to get in to your mind.
I know it’s too easy to get influenced by negative remarks but it is too important to zero down on paying attention to them. The best way out is to never get into details of criticism, if there is a problem, someone says anything against you never go into the 2 hour version of the story, better, go into the 20 seconds version, don’t call your friends and discuss that she said that about me or people in my office are not nice etc. It’s a lot easier to keep the poison out if you never hear it in the first place. Don’t ever go to the people or indulge in the conversation that give you the extended version of what people think about you, there are lots of people keep saying all rubbish just don’t get bothered.
If you hear people talking bad about you think this way: pay it no mind, just give it no attention, it’s a distraction and remember people don’t talk about ordinary people they talk about extraordinary people, they wouldn’t be talking about you unless you are credible enough, take it as a complement.
You have to accept the fact that some people will not like you and you can do nothing about that, everyone is not going to celebrate you, everybody is not going to handle your success so don’t pay attention to what people have to say about you, just do your work. Don’t waste your time to make people understand you that are determined to misunderstand you.
“Run your race, focus on your goals, God will bring the right people into your life.”
I read a research that I liked it said that 25% of the people that you meet won’t like you and never will. 25% won’t like you but could be persuaded to, 25% will like you but could be persuaded to not, and 25% will like you and stand by you no matter what.
You can give flowers to the former 25% everyday, give them a compliment every hour, mow their lawn everyday, or even wipe their floor thrice a day but those people are still not going to like you, you shouldn’t waste your time trying to win them over. Keep your walls up, too many people allow everything to let in, be it frustration, negative talks, criticism etc., you got to guard your heart and never let it mull over the negative, nobody else can do this for you.
“You can’t live a positive life thinking negative thoughts.”
Nothing can offend you without your permission, people can say whatever they want to but you have the right to ignore it. Life is too short to live that way; never forget that every day is a gift from God, don’t waste it, rather live it.
Just, for a moment, Imagine if you found out you aren’t going to be here in 6 months. If you know your time has come then how many things that upset you now would you allow to upset you? If you don’t keep your walls up, it will keep you from the fullness of your destiny. Remember you have limited emotional energy every day, don’t waste it on negative conversations, frustrations or badmouthing others, in fact, use if for your own goals, your own dreams, your family and make your life better.
You are not what people label you, you are what God labels you.